Funniest Moments in D&D or any RPG
I have been playing D&D for ten years now and have had quiet a few funny moments in the game. I was wanting to hear from other people about their funniest or coolest moments in D&D or any RPG game.
One of the funny things that has happened was when i just started learning D&D and was playing two characters: a wizard and a fighter. We were in charge of getting back a magical staff from a group of traveling hobgoblins. My characters were both low leveled so i could not just charge in and attack people. So i made my fighter run out into the field where their camp was and get their attention and have them chase around trying to catch my fighter. My Mage had recently learned the sleep spell and i wanted to try it out. So the plan was to cast sleep on the hobgoblins while they chased my fighter then we would take the staff and leave. I forgot that Sleep has a radius effect as well So while the hobgoblins fell asleep so did my fighter. So i ran over as a mage with only my 1d4 staff and started beating the hobgoblins with it. I managed to kill one then the other three woke up. Them being magical creatures immediately came to and started fighting me while my human fighter was dazed for two turns because he hit his head as he fell. So needless to say we got taken capture and my mage got eaten.
Sad for my characters funny for me.
Another funny time was when the very same fighter was sent on a mission to rescue a princess from a tower. Three Giants took the girl hostage and were guarding the tower. I managed to sneak past the giants and into the tower. Once i got to the room where the princess was in she was asleep. I attempted to wake her without waking the giants. I shook her gently and she awoke in a rage and punched my fighter. I failed my reflects save and toppled out of the tower window. Landing on the head of a giant it picked me off and threw my character over a nearby hill and out to the ocean. I never went back to that bitch of a princess and left the land in embarrassment.
One of the funny things that has happened was when i just started learning D&D and was playing two characters: a wizard and a fighter. We were in charge of getting back a magical staff from a group of traveling hobgoblins. My characters were both low leveled so i could not just charge in and attack people. So i made my fighter run out into the field where their camp was and get their attention and have them chase around trying to catch my fighter. My Mage had recently learned the sleep spell and i wanted to try it out. So the plan was to cast sleep on the hobgoblins while they chased my fighter then we would take the staff and leave. I forgot that Sleep has a radius effect as well So while the hobgoblins fell asleep so did my fighter. So i ran over as a mage with only my 1d4 staff and started beating the hobgoblins with it. I managed to kill one then the other three woke up. Them being magical creatures immediately came to and started fighting me while my human fighter was dazed for two turns because he hit his head as he fell. So needless to say we got taken capture and my mage got eaten.
Sad for my characters funny for me.Another funny time was when the very same fighter was sent on a mission to rescue a princess from a tower. Three Giants took the girl hostage and were guarding the tower. I managed to sneak past the giants and into the tower. Once i got to the room where the princess was in she was asleep. I attempted to wake her without waking the giants. I shook her gently and she awoke in a rage and punched my fighter. I failed my reflects save and toppled out of the tower window. Landing on the head of a giant it picked me off and threw my character over a nearby hill and out to the ocean. I never went back to that bitch of a princess and left the land in embarrassment.
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My players liked the idea.
So we were gaming, their characters are in some deep trouble. They are trying to escape from inside a deep dungeon. Out of arrows and monster burn oil, low on spells, wounded with few cures left. No character unscathed.
Their characters are hoping a door they found will be a short cut out.
They make a roll to open the door. I say in a hushed voice, "your character opens the door and hears..."
At that exact moment, as they are waiting for me to speak the next words that mean life or death for their characters, the timers rings, loudly !
There are screams, yells, and "Oh, wait, thats the break timer ! Not an attack ! Arrrgghhh !"
I didn't roll for wandering monsters, we took a well needed break.
Yes, it was a shorter way out.
As things went rough, he charged in, trapping a thug barring escape under the colapsed door.
With the help of the giant, the party quickly managed to take control of things when I said
"Hey, the guy under the door is stirring..."
The giant's player look at me with an evil grin and said with a low, slow, dumb and grumbling voice
"Can I jump on the door, please ?"
That was 20 years ago, but I still remember the face and voice of the player.
Needless to say, he pulped the poor guy...
Later, in the same adventure, the party killed two trolls and were just recovering when they noticed heavy steps in the wood. They all managed to hide succesfully when they noticed five young trolls. The giant immediately stepped in their way, and said, with the same grin and merry voice :
"Hullo, we just killed your mom and da!"
That was role - playing !
And two Profantasy stories:
My credit card company call me every time I purchuse from PF because its an over seas transaction. I always tell them its a valid transaction. One time, the bank called, and it was this "Little Old Lady" on the other end. She said "We have an over seas transaction on your card" Then whispers "Its from a site called profantasy....." With a big smile on my face I told her to accept it.
And:
I was working on a major campaign, doing lots of maps during the evening, from my home office. This took months. At the end of it, I did the floorplan to my house in DD3, and it looked really good, so I showed it to my wife. She has never seen any pf products, and asked me how I did it. I explained it to her, and told her thats what I had been doing the past months. A look of relief came over her face, and she sheepishly admitted that she thought I was having some sort of online affair all this time....
They were in a dungeon walking down a hallway.
The rogue in the party spotted a tripwire and everybode carefully stepped over it.
Then the last character in the party said. "Hmm, am curious", and pulled the tripwire.
The physical layout was important so I'll have to detail that. I am DM and sitting at a kitchen island. The players were all sitting around a rectangular table and closest player was my younger brother. Five other players were also playing that day.
The group had been battling fire salamanders with relative ease upon entering a particular fortress dungeon. Upon entering a larger room with a large lava pool and island in middle with two large fire salamanders the monk (who won initiative) leaps to island. Upon landing the noble fire salamanders landed two critical attacks on monk. The fighters in party could not cross lava so easily and were waiting for priest or wizard (my brother) to cast a spell to assist fighters with getting to fight. My brother told monk if he simply did a high kick to face noble salamanders would die. Brother stood up and said, "Kick them like this." and did a side kick in the air about head level. My brother was between me (DM) and rest of player group and I was looking at other players since brother always performs antics while role playing. All the players simultaneously got horrified looks, covered their eyes, screamed, and looked away really quick. All of them were screaming things like, "sick, gross, oh my I never wanted to see that, sit down, please no more, yuck" plus a few others I don't want to post. At that moment I am wondering what on earth was so bad about the high kick. My brother calmly adjusted his short soccer shorts, sits down, and says, "I'm sorry guys, I didn't put underwear on this morning." After that I realized what happened and everyone laughed for a good 5 minutes. A video of my view would have been priceless. I've asked group to recreate that scene so I can get on video and all of them refuse, except my brother.
Since it was a one-shot visit the DM had me play one of the NPC's that had no special skills or powers other than I flew the dirigible and was a stealthy thief. He told me I could do whatever I could think up as long as it didn't involve magic or super-powers. Fine, I said. Unfortunately he forgot that I learned quite a bit about explosives, combat, & impromptu devices of mayhem during my time in 'Nam. Heh-Heh! I asked permission of the DM & while my character was in town to make some purchases. He allowed me to do so and the character purchased string, a roll of electrical-tape, a 6 pack of coca-cola, 4 boxes of condoms, & 6 bottles of ******. I'm not telling what the final element was because it is a common household item. My friends were now getting suspicious because of the odd nature of the items, but they were curious because they knew it would be fun.
The object of this adventure was to invade a heavily occupied enemy military base and steal some device & get back out again, while destroying the base so that the enemy aircraft wouldn't be able to stop the "Liberators" attempting to free some prisoners elsewhere. As we sneaked into the area we discovered that 4 heavily fortified open bunkers guarded the small valley. Each bunker had one or two magic users or power users plus a dozen soldiers with snipers, machine guns and rockets. Heavy odds, thought the party & they were puzzled about how to defeat these bunkers so that they could attack the main base without getting slaughtered. I said, give me a couple of hours & leave it to me. I described sneaking up to each bunker (made my rolls, he had really high stealth) and in each one's ammo supply I taped an open bottle of ****** to a rocket, using the string over a bottle I filled a condom with the coca-cola & nested several condoms over the inner one to serve as a timing device. The coke will slowly dissolve the condoms and drop into the bottle and react explosively creating a fire-bomb. I also did this to the main base's armory and stole back to the party. All of a sudden each bunker & the main armory blew up & burst into flames killing the occupants including the super-villains. The rest of the part strolled into the main base & completed the mission, but my NPC earned 90% of the experience points in the adventure instead of them going to the PC's. Heh-Heh!